What is Heart Talk Psychotherapy ?
Who we are today has been highly influenced by the experiences we have had in the past, particularly in childhood, because the way we are treated and the messages we have internalized, at a time of innocence, lay the foundations for what we feel about ourselves.
Although these experiences may no longer be part of our conscious awareness in everyday life, nevertheless they they effect the choices we make and the way we react or respond in the present.
Many people have grown up with little sense of being seen for who they are - but rather have had to adapt and comply to the expectations of parents and others. However this can lead to feelings of emptiness, hopelessness, anger, sadness or shame about being unknown, unheard or misunderstood. This can manifest as a sense of "joyless striving" or depression, constant anxiety that seems inexplicable, or a sense of shame about ones feelings and needs.
For some, there may have been physical / sexual, and / or emotional abuse - or other 'secrets' - in the family that have not been allowed to be told.
Allowing your self to speak from your heart connects you to a deeper sense of yourself, to feelings, experiences and memories that may have been hidden and enables your true-self to be known and mirrored in a new and empathetic way.
For all of us , vulnerability is both the most feared and the most rewarding experience - but only by being vulnerable can we really come to know ourselves or others in a way that is not just cognitive 'knowing'. Though at first emotional-intuitive knowing can be confusing, clarity emerges as you come to know its pathways and feel more real, grounded, connected , loving and empowered.
Alain De Botton from the "School of Life" has produced a nice little video that tells about the gains of psychotherapy , for eveyone, and says that you don't have a have a big problem to find it useful . Watch it here
Alain De Botton has also writen on artlice on " why you need to see a therapist"
Philosopher /Poet David Whyte says that "vulnerability is not a weakness, a passing indisposition, or something we can arrange to do without, vulnerability is not a choice, vulnerability is the underlying, ever present and abiding under-current of our natural state. To run from vulnerability is to run from the essence of our nature, the attempt to be invulnerable is the vain attempt to become something we are not and most especially, to close off our understanding of the grief of others. More seriously, in refusing our vulnerability we refuse the help needed at every turn of our existence and immobilize the essential, tidal and conversational foundations of our identity. Read more here
Dr. Brene Brown who has researched vulnerability also says that " vulnerability is absolutely essential to whole hearted living". Vulnerability is not weakness, it is the ultimate courage. The thing that gets in the way of valuing vulnerability is shame. Shame is the experience that cripples us and make us want to run and avoid our truth.
You might like to watch these you-tube videos for your interest:
I can't promise that the process will be pain-free , old fears as well as needs, loves and longings are bound to emerge, but if you allow your heart to open, the increased connecton to yourself and others is worth it.
Contact Linde Rose at:
“There are those, that are not frightened of grief: dropping deep into the sorrow, they find therein a necessary elixir to the numbness. When they encounter one another, when they press their foreheads against the bark of a centuries-old tree…their eyes well with tears that fall easily to the ground. The soil needs this water. Grief is but a gate, and our tears a kind of key opening a place of wonder that’s been locked away. Suddenly we notice a sustaining resonance between the drumming heart within our chest and the pulse rising from the ground.”
Links to articles:
Will you make a commitment to no longer abandon yourself and your present experience? That no matter what thought, feeling, emotion, or sensation arises, you will offer it a home within you, setting aside the conclusion that it is a mistake, a problem which must be fixed, or evidence that something is wrong with you?
Mature Complaining (Alaine De Botton)
Donald Winnicott Quotes